How to Wait on God for a Spouse
How to wait on God for a husband is a question you may be asking if you have the desire to be married, and you truly want to wait on who God has for you.
Waiting on God for a spouse can be difficult, but it is such a beautiful and life-changing process if you give that time, and the desires of your heart to the Lord.
God gave me the desire to be a wife when I was in the 8th grade, and that desire grew more and more every single year.
The wait for my husband was so hard and I hit so many bumps in the road, but I learned important lessons about leaning on Him. I also learned what to do to prepare for my future marriage during the waiting.
You’re probably wondering.. what does it look like to wait on God for a husband?
And if I could summarize the answer to that question in just one sentence it would be: Trust Jesus through your season of waiting. Easier said than done right?
I want to encourage you in this today: Whatever God has for you cannot be stopped by anything or anyone.
Now with that being said you do have to lean into him, listen to him, and follow his guidance.
When you are seeking him and his guidance, he will lead you straight to that person. Nothing can stop what God has for you!
Down below, I created a list of 11 things that will help you as you navigate your season of waiting on God to bring you a husband. These have helped me develop my faith in God and have bettered myself while waiting for my husband.
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My Waiting on God for a Husband Testimony
Okay, spoiler alert… I did a terrible job of waiting on God to bring me, my husband!
Like I said earlier, my heart desired to be a wife, and a family of my own, but starting at the very beginning of 10th grade, I was in an on-and-off again bad relationship for 4 and a half years.
I knew for a fact Jesus didn’t want me in this relationship, but I stayed anyway.
I was so scared of being alone that I just couldn’t leave. It was seriously like I was in chains.
Satan took this relationship and ran with it. I was so depressed and anxious it was terrible!
Fast forward 3 years, and I graduated and went to Middle Tennessee State University for College. That November I had finally had enough of that terrible relationship, and God moved in power like never before.
Before I would have done anything for that person, but on a November night, it was like the chains fell off and so did the blinders. I realized that a relationship this toxic was not normal.
God had completely broken the bondage and chains of that relationship. God gave me every ounce of courage and a ‘see ya’ attitude it took to get out of that relationship. I blocked him and never looked back.
Two nights later, I felt the desire to be married creep up again, but this time I knew God had to work on me first.
Through the ugly crying, I fell to my knees and prayed, “Jesus, I don’t care how old I am, I will wait for the person you have for me. In your perfect timing bring him to me. I surrender my love story completely to you.”
And y’all I meant it. I asked for forgiveness for staying in that awful relationship when I knew he was telling me to leave, and I genuinely wanted Him to guide me from here on out.
Because I am terrible at managing my own life!
That month I got serious about deepening my relationship with God and practiced and used the 11 tips down below. I noticed and felt such a difference and started to be confident as a single woman!
When December came, it was time to go home for Christmas break. I packed up my dorm room and headed back home to Arkansas.
I looked at my phone when I had gotten home, and a text from my best friend from home said something along the lines of, ‘hey I miss you come over tomorrow night!’
The next night came, and I walked through her front door greeting her with a huge hug. She pulled away with excitement and told me someone she was talking to is coming over along with one of his friends. All I could think was ‘No! I don’t want boys!”
I genuinely enjoyed that month of singleness and just that time with the Lord.
But as I thought about how badly I didn’t want them to come over, in walks the guy she was talking to, and a familiar face that I recognized from high school.
You guessed it! It was my now husband! It’s funny how when you aren’t looking, God drops that person right in front of you.
I believe for me it took getting my heart right, surrendering to God’s plan, and trusting Him.
Sometimes when God makes you wait for a spouse, He is trying to get your attention so you set your focus on Him.
1, because that is the 1st commandment. We are to love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. (Matthew 22:37-38).
And 2, when we love God first, that is how we will know how to love our husbands correctly and fulfill the role of a godly wife well.
Down below are 11 tips on what to do when waiting for God to bring you a husband. I did these and they deepened my relationship with Jesus and prepared me to be a wife.
If you’re in a waiting season and so ready to meet your future spouse, use these tips! They were a game-changer for me!
11 Tips you can put into practice while waiting on God for a Spouse:
Here are 11 tips on what to do while waiting on God for a spouse.
These are the things God taught me during my season of waiting. These 11 tips will grow your relationship with God and prepare you to fulfill the role of a godly wife.
1. While waiting on God for a spouse, surrender to God’s plan and His perfect timing.
Proverbs 16:9 says, “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.”
We have to lay down what we think our life should look like and surrender to God’s plan. This also means laying down the timing of when we think something should happen.
Whether it’s been a month of waiting, or years of waiting for God to bring you the life partner He has for you, don’t give up! Pray, seek Jesus, and know that He knows your heart’s desire.
Just know that while you wait on God to lead you to your spouse He makes everything beautiful in His timing. (Ecclesiastes 3:11)
2. Pray for your future husband.
Ephesians is a great place to study a Biblical marriage.
Ephesians 5:25 says, “For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her”, and Ephesians 5:28 says, “In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.”
While you’re waiting on God for a husband, pray that your future spouse would love you like Christ loves the church, and as he loves his own body.
I love the Bible verse James 5:16. It says, “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.“
How amazing is it that God hears our prayers. Remember my friend, your prayers are powerful and produce wonderful results. Never stop praying!
A few things to pray for your future husband:
- That he would be a godly leader of your home.
- That he would love God with all his heart, mind, soul, and strength.
- That he would put God first in all things.
- That he would be a godly example to your children.
- That he would love you the way God has intended for a husband to love a wife.
- For protection over him before and after you meet him.
- That he would not give in to temptations.
- He would be a good communicator and striver for unity in your marriage.
I want to encourage you to add these to a prayer journal and pray them over your future husband. If you think of more feel free to add them!
Wondering about ways to use a prayer journal? I’ll show you, here!
3. Pray for yourself as a future wife.
When you’re learning how to wait on God for a husband, I know it is so much easier to pray for him, but listen, you need to pray for yourself as a future wife.
I’ll say it a million times over again. Pray for you!
I know you are so excited to meet a godly man who will be yours for the rest of your life, but hear me out… marriage is hard!
It’s beautiful and amazing, but marriage takes dying to your flesh daily! Marriage really can make you see how selfish you are, and sometimes it’s hard to do the right thing in marriage.
Another thing is, marriage is God’s will for a man and a woman, so therefore Satan hates that. Now thank the Lord for Luke 10:19. “Look, I have given you authority over all the power of the enemy, and you can walk among snakes and scorpions and crush them. Nothing will injure you.”
So, my friend, I encourage you to pray before, during, and after meeting your husband!
I think everyone would say they want their marriage to be as good as it can be on earth right?
Something I use to pray for my husband is the book The Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie Omartian. My mother-in-law, who I look up to so much, gave me this as a gift once, and it has changed my prayer life for my husband!
It gives you so many ways to pray for your husband. It’s amazing!
But what gets me is the very first prayer. You would think alright let’s get to praying for my husband. No. It’s a prayer for you as a wife!
It hit me so hard. As wives, we have to get our hearts right. We can’t let selfishness, or anger towards our husband give the devil a foothold in our marriage.
Ephesians 5:24 says, “As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.” Then Ephesians 5:33 says So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”
I also just love what Gary Thomas says in an article he wrote.
It says, “In Proverbs 31 we find a very different sort of husband and wife. They complement each other perfectly because they share a spiritual depth. The wife’s influence is so powerful that her husband and family can’t help but praise her (verse 28). The husband is equally worthy of admiration: “Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land” (verse 23). He meets with the leaders to give advice and help people solve their problems. His wife also provides wise instruction and is faithful in all the roles and responsibilities God has given her: “She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue” (verse 26).”
To be the couple described in Proverbs 31, we have to pray and gather those godly characteristics for ourselves.
I would think everyone wants to accomplish great things and show the world Jesus in their marriage, and I believe this is achievable when we allow God to lead us and when we pray for ourselves, and our future husbands.
You can find that article here!
A few things to pray for as a future wife:
- That you would submit, and be respectful to your husband.
- That you would love him the way God has intended for a wife to love a husband.
- That you would have a gentle and quiet spirit.
- That the Holy Spirit would give you clear direction, wisdom, and knowledge to know if the person you are dating is the one God has for you.
- That God would soften your heart towards your husband when you are frustrated, or angry.
Again, a prayer journal is an amazing spot to keep prayers for you as a wife! Add them, and if you think of any more feel free to add them as God brings them to your heart.
4. While you wait on God for a spouse, don’t waste your singleness.
Pray for a desire to further the kingdom of God with and without your husband. Build a foundation of the wife you want to be in your marriage.
And what I mean by that, is don’t wait on God to bring you a husband to serve Jesus or be on fire for him. Seek Jesus, be obedient, go on that mission trip, or move to where He calls you.
Trust Jesus and know that who He has for you will show up at just the right time.
Right now, in a season of singleness and figuring out how to wait on God for a husband, solely press into God. Let Him build up your ‘resume’ if you will.
Let Him develop godly characteristics in you during your singleness, so when God does bring you your husband you have something to contribute to your marriage.
I know it’s hard to understand, but I can say this because I’ve been there. A season of singleness is a gift.
Being hidden and in secret is a gift.
Know that in God’s perfect timing, God will bring you a husband. Trusting Him is simply knowing He has your back, and that no matter what, what He has for you, no one and nothing can stop that.
5. Don’t settle.
This tip is key in waiting on God for a husband. There may be many guys who come your way, but this is where you have to discern whether this guy is the right person for you.
Can I just say that if someone disrespects you, pushes boundaries, talks down to you, or makes everything seem like your fault, that is not the relationship you want or deserve to be in.
Trust what Jesus is showing you because if they do that when you’re dating, they will do it times 10 if you marry them.
Ask God to help you love life as a single woman while you wait for God to bring you a husband.
Listening and trusting your godly friend’s judgments is a great way to not settle. They will see things you may not see. But ultimately you have to trust what Jesus tells you.
6. Make reading the Bible a priority.
Seeking God’s word is how we know the heart of God. And when we know the heart of God, this helps us discern who is a man of God.
Knowing the Word for yourself is so important. Hide it in your heart.
When you want to hear God speak, the best way to do that is to read His word.
Starting the day off with his word is the best thing I could do for myself when I was waiting on God for a husband. He always showed me the right way, and the right path to go (Psalm 25:4).
It kept my eyes on him, and when I did get weary and frustrated in a season of life, it gave me joy and perspective throughout my day.
“Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.” – Joshua 1:8
Start your day with a Bible study, or if mornings are super busy, have a verse you pray on and meditate on all throughout your day. It is so crucial to discerning the things of God.
Fill your life and your heart with God’s promises that are in His Word.
Something that has also helped is having a verse a week that you memorize. I want to encourage you in hiding the word of God in your heart. (Psalm 119:11)
My Bible that I love:
7. Develop close friendships
When I have some friends that are truly like my sisters. They are my sisters in Christ, and just like family. Friendship is such a good thing to invest in.
Close friends are such a gift, and it is a relationship you have to work to maintain. When you find those godly friends that love you and encourage you, keep them, and tend to that relationship while you are waiting on God to bring you a husband.
But even when God does bring you a husband, don’t let your close friendships go. Trust me. Those friends who are like sisters are so important in your life!
Spoiler alert, husbands and wives don’t think alike about everything. For example, jealousy.
You see someone has something you want whether that be a new car, a bigger house, or whatever it may be. Husbands do not understand that. Some may, but most don’t simply because our brains are not alike.
This is where you need a friend rooted in Christ to talk you through something like that and bring you back to reality. Just because you have a husband does not mean you don’t need godly friends.
We are meant to live in community! Find those sweet friends that will have your back always.
And if you don’t have those close friendships right now, I want to encourage you to pray for that.
I was once in that boat of loneliness, and God was faithful to bring me such sweet friends who are like sisters.
“There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” -Proverbs 18:24
8. Work on something to bring into your marriage.
Think of an area of your life that you want to work on, or start something new.
There are so many new things you can learn, or skills you already have that need to be developed.
For example, you could take a cooking class, start a fitness class, or start a new Bible study.
Maybe you want to develop a new skill that God is calling you to that will later turn into a possible business!
Whatever it is, find something that you can get good at so you can bring something into the marriage.
Something I needed to work on and develop was cleaning, cooking (still working on that one), and deepening my relationship with Jesus.
I wanted my husband to come home to a relaxing house with good food (again still working on that), and a wife who trusted in Jesus with all her heart. I had to imagine the wife I wanted my husband to have, and work on getting to that woman.
9. Know that obedience is worship.
When you are wondering about how to wait on God for a husband, something so important is staying out of relationships God has told you not to be in.
Don’t let comfort become something that makes you stay in a relationship the Lord has made clear for you not to be in. And don’t entertain someone the Lord has told you not to be with.
We have to be willing to do things God’s way. He will never lead you astray.
How can God lead you to your spouse if you are with someone He didn’t even want you around in the first place?
Obey Him. He knows what is best for you, and we have to trust that!
Not leaving a relationship God told you to leave is being disobedient.
Ephesians 5:10 says, “Carefully determine what pleases the Lord. Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them.”
I want you to hear me out because I was in this place once. If you’re in a relationship where someone is disrespectful, or pushing boundaries, that is not okay.
In every relationship, I want to encourage you to seek the Lord and carefully determine if the relationship you’re in right now truly pleases God.
Not only do we need to be obedient in our relationships, but we need to be obedient in everything God commands us to do.
If God has told you to do something, start something, or go somewhere (for a mission trip for example) be obedient.
I’m not saying your husband will be there, and it shouldn’t be about looking for a spouse, because Jesus will bring your person when it’s His perfect timing, but you never know what will come about that opportunity!
10. Develop a quiet time with God.
There is no way we can develop a deeper relationship with God when we don’t spend time with Him. We need this time to focus on Him and Him alone.
Quiet time is when you give God your full attention and spend one-on-one time with Him. During this time you would study the Bible, and pray.
And I want you to understand that quiet time doesn’t have to be a long time.
Some people get intimidated by this concept of quiet time because they think you just sit and pray for hours.
Let God lead how long or how short your quiet time is.
As we covered in the 2nd and 3rd tips, a prayer from a righteous person is powerful and effective. Prayer is our direct communication with God.
God instructs us on how to pray in Matthew 6:6.
“But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.” -Matthew 6:6
This is your time to communicate with God about anything and everything.
Anytime you feel frustrated, anxious, or confused during your time of waiting on God for a husband, give him that emotion.
Give him what you feel, and he will give you peace that surpasses all understanding. He is faithful and loving enough to take that from you, and when He does our perspective shifts.
1 Peter 5:7 says, “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.”
Quiet time develops a deeper relationship with Jesus and produces godly characteristics in yourself that you can bring into your future marriage.
Something I love to do during my quiet time is write out prayers in my prayer journal.
The other night I was looking at some that I had written 8 years ago! It’s amazing how God orchestrated everything in my life and answered every prayer about bringing me a husband.
Keep a prayer journal! I love mine so much!
Prayer journals and supplies I love:
Coffee and Bible Time Prayer Journal
11. Understand the characteristics of a godly man
While waiting on God to bring you a husband it is so important that you know what a godly man looks like.
When someone truly loves the Lord and spends time with him, they will produce fruit.
If you don’t see any of these things mentioned in Galatians 5:22-23, and they don’t put God first, then that is a good indicator that this may not who you want to be spending your time with.
“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!” -Galatians 5:22-23
Bible verses to cling to and pray while you are waiting on God for a spouse.
“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts, says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.” -Isaiah 55:8-9
“Teach me your ways, O Lord, that I may live according to your truth! Grant me purity of heart, so that I may honor you.” -Psalm 86:11
“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” -Romans 8:28
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” –Jeremiah 29:11
“For his unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth.” -Psalm 103:11
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” -Proverbs 3:5-6
Here are 100 Bible verses about preparing for a godly marriage that you can pray through and meditate on as well!
Conclusions on How to Wait on God for a Husband
I hope you enjoyed and will practice these 11 tips of what to do while waiting on God for a spouse. They were truly life-changing in my relationship with God.
Waiting on God for a spouse is all about trusting God’s timing, and His plan for your life.
I just want to encourage you to try these tips because I know that they helped me.
I pray that as you let God lead you to your husband, your relationship with God would deepen and that you would surrender your love story to Him!
The right man will come along. God’s got this!
Related to How To Wait on God for a Husband:
How God Brought Me My Husband: 7 signs I knew He Was the One
How To Have Quiet Time With God
How to Wait on God for a Husband